Fragments of Paris

Unfinished posts, thoughts, etc. 

So it begins….

I walked the streets of Paris today. I wonder if people could tell I was ready to scream out of sheer excitement (I decided to hold back, seeing how the day before I had succeeded in causing enough of a scene. More on that later).

Everything seems simultaneously foreign and familiar. I feel displaced and as if I belong, all at once. Even now, as I sit and type in la salle des professeurs at the lycee at which I’ll teach, I am flooded by brilliant pictures of Paris that my eyes have had the privilege of capturing.

This being my second time moving to Europe, you would think I would have learned to travel more efficiently. Nope! (Although, in all fairness, I am living here for 7+ months so there was a lot I needed to bring).  In an effort to save some money, I decided to take the RER into the city. That was easy enough, although with two large suitcases and a large backpack, I struggled moving from place to place. The elevators found in the airport aided my sloth-like progression towards the platform. Finally, after wiggling through metro gates, I finally made it onto the RER and was on my way to Paris. And that’s where all the fun began…

My first day in Trieste was exhausting because I couldn’t find the location of the residence. I had no trouble finding my way to my couchsurfing host’s place. No, it was the journey to get there that would prove tiresome. I won’t get too much into the details, but just know that it was a STRUGGLE getting from metro to metro. I had to go up many stairs. Some were easy enough, while others were anything but. And of course, since I went up a lot of stairs I also had to go down a lot of stairs. I developed a system of moving each piece one at a time. There were many instances where I caught a brief smile of a passerby; a sort of “aw, how cute… and pathetic” type of smile. I mostly received stares, though.

Two months in...

Yesterday marked two months since my arrival in Paris. It seems like I’ve been here longer, though.

My job is turning out to be quite an interesting and rewarding experience. Truth be told, it’s not excessively demanding (this week is the first time I’ve worked the full 12 hours); however, I am finding it to be very enriching. I am getting along well with my colleagues. The English teachers seem appreciative to have me here and they have done a lot to make me feel welcomed. Communication is much more difficult with the other teachers, but we manage to converse sporadically. Since I know Spanish, I’m also able to communicate with the Spanish teachers. They’ve also requested that I go and speak in some of their classes. I’ve also found a teacher that would like to improve her English, so we usually practice over a coffee in the salle des professeurs. I’m enjoying it all tremendously. At times it feels surreal; now, for instance. I’m in the Salle, surrounded by teachers speaking French, most of which I find unintelligible (although I have noted a slight improvement in my comprehension skills). I don’t think I could have imagined being here six months ago!   

The students also make this job great. I work in a ZEP (Zone d’éducation prioritaire), which means students usually don’t perform as well. My high school is a lycée polyvalent so most of the students are studying to become nurses, secretaries, etc. Also, most of my students are from African or North African descent. Their level of English is low, and many of them lack motivation (mostly because they don’t believe they’ll need English in their field of work). In spite of all this, I have found that most of the students are very excited to have me here. It’s great walking around the school and hearing  “Hi Alfrrredo!” Makes me feel a little popular, haha. 

Tulips...

The tulips are in bloom. Life is good. I try to fully enjoy this moment, but the spectre of my inevitable departure clouds the joy I experience. This city has charmed me in ways that no other person ever could. I do not wish to leave. I need to act, but I find myself unable to begin. It is easy to lose oneself in the ecstasy of sun-kissed moments, in explorations of an author's mind, in the midst of faceless people that you will never come to know...but reality soon descends. I will rise from my place in the park, and the dread of leaving will return: the dread of not knowing what lies ahead, the dread of not being capable of becoming who I would like to be...But for now, the sun caresses my skin as an invisible band plays familiar tunes. For now, the tulips are in bloom. 

À Paris

I think enough time has elapsed since my arrival. It's time to fill you in.

I guess I should start from the beginning. I arrived in Paris after a 16+ hour journey from San Francisco to Seattle to Reykjavik to Paris. The flight itself wasn't too bad, but they did not provide any meals during the flight. You get what you pay for, I guess. Once in Paris, I had to make my way over to the 13th arrondissement (that is where my couchsurfing host lives). In an effort to save some money, I decided to take the RER into the city and then use the metro system to reach my destination. I would soon find out that this plan would not be easy with two large suitcases and a heavy backpack. I will spare you the details of my harrowing journey, but just know that it was very difficult trekking up many flights of stairs, then down more flights of stairs, and then up again. The silver lining of my dumb decision: I got a great workout and I think I made an impression on the Parisians in the metro (probably not a positive impression, but an impression nonetheless).

I approached the high-rise where I would eventually stay for about 10 days (thank you, Freddy!) just as my host was arriving from work. Good timing! I feel fortunate to have had a good first couchsurfing experience. My host was generous, helpful, and we got along well. These 10 days passed quickly. I began my housing search immediately, but I was getting nowhere. People had warned me that it was very difficult to find housing, and they were right. I went to a few appointments, and most of them had well over 20 people vying for the same studio. Most of the people there were also French, with French guaranties. I stood no chance.

Although the stress of being "homeless" was following me wherever I went, I still managed to have some fun: a run along the Seine under a clear blue sky, wine with friends near pont des arts, wine near the eiffel tower, real champagne at Trocadero with a glowing tower hiding behind the trees, fire works at Sacre Coeur (you get the picture). It's been so much fun meeting new people and forming new connections. I haven't been this excited in a long time!

So back to my search for housing. Through what seems like sheer luck, I met an older gentleman that knew of someone with a free apartment. He was able to set up a meeting for me and soon after, I was no longer homeless! I love the place and the area around it. It's not the best neighborhood, but it is a vibrant and colorful place.

As for work, I have visited the school several times and have met with the English teachers. I haven't started work yet, but I'm eager for it to get underway. It'll be an interesting experience, at the very least. Luckily, the commute is not bad. From Gare St. Lazare in Paris, it takes me less than 15 minutes to get to Val d'Argenteuil. I spend a longer time getting from my place to the train station.

There is probably more to say, but I grow lazy. And I actually just returned from an incredible run: along the Seine then up to Sacre Coeur. I'm tired! But I guess I'll end it by saying thank you to everyone that has helped me get to where I am today. Even now, I feel so fortunate to be here and to be this happy. It's almost unreal. Although things are far from perfect, I can't remember the last time I felt this type of exhilaration. I'm excited for the time ahead of me, and for what I'll do with that time.

La Primavera

I emerge from my hibernation. The sun strikes each morning with greater brilliance and I stand there, bewildered, my eyes adjusting to the influx of light. Winter is fleeing. Her howls, her rain, her snow, and her chills have lost their potency. Only her shadow remains. Soon that too will vanish and make way for primavera. It is time for change. 
The arrival of spring has brought with her the breath of life. Everything has taken upon a new splendor: from the city to the sea, all radiate a glow that only spring can bestow. 

I realize I have been absent for a while and I will fill in the missing pieces in due time. But for now, I am savoring the exquisite present:: a diamond-filled sea, the loving spring breeze, the pulsating beat of the Adriatic, and the numerous souls abound. This is life! This is Italy! Beauty radiating, caressing, teeming from the laughter, from the barking dogs, from the impatient cars, from the elderly couples on an afternoon stroll, from the crying seagulls up above, from the sunbathing youths, from my beating heart. And I breath deeply (because for some strange reason, breathing deeply during these moments of harmonic beauty emphasizes that feeling that you live). But alas, the moment had to end and I had to continue onwards to my lecture. 


The month of March has been relatively tranquil. I started my courses during the first week and for the most part, I am enjoying the lectures. Since the weather now permits, I have also started running regularly-ish (which is a VERY good thing, since my eating habits have taken a turn for the worse. The cafeteria is a buffet for me and it becomes difficult to practice restraint when there is pizza and french fries offered every day!). I have settled into Trieste very well and have become very comfortable, although part of me is leery of this so-called comfort. I cannot become too comfortable since I am only here for a few more months (although I am not too worried. Spring has invigorated my sense of adventure and excitement). With that said, I am sad to report that a very good friend of mine will be embarking on his own study abroad experience in Munster, Germany on Wednesday. It will be strange to say goodbye, since he has been one of my closest friends here. I wish him the best and I will be seeing him at the end of May in Germany. On a brighter note, my friend Daniel will be coming to Trieste around Easter. I also have a trip planned (and by 'planned' I mean the tickets have been purchased) to Sicillia! I cannot wait!  


Well, that is all for now. I will be back soon to fill in the gap between December and now. Although, if I remember correctly, (which I probably don't) Winter was not filled with many thrills. I guess we'll see. 


Ciao 


P.S. Here are some pics of Trieste for anyone who is interested. I am photographing Trieste under sepia whenever I have my camera handy: Click Here!!!

Time is...

The leaves, strewn across cobblestone paths, succumbing to the weight of footsteps in a moment of excruciating pleasure; a moment wherein these two forces reach an ecstasy that is gone before fully understood, and forgotten by the time the foot's contact ceases; and all that remain are the leaves, golden, and in ruin. Does there exist a more emphatic scene to demonstrate the passage of time? Once a vibrant green and atop majestic trees, the leaves now decorate the streets, and with the softest of whispers, remind us that the sands of Time continue to fall.

Time, a perpetual entity by its very nature, is the contradiction of man, of mortality. Yet, it is our very own mortality that comes to be defined in terms of this eternal entity. This juxtaposition between the eternal and the non-eternal creates a relationship that is oftentimes menacing, for once those grains of sands have fallen, they cannot be regained. This, however, should not be cause for anxiety. Time, in itself, is objective, neither good nor bad. It is man's mind that decorates it, and turns it from the objective to the subjective. And thus, it is from man's mind that we harness (albeit superficially) Time, and in many ways, it is with the mind that we come to define it. Man's perspective has the ability to shape, create, and distort. Therefore, it is no surprise that the definition of time is relative in relation to each individual's perspective. I apologize for this discombobulated piece. Through this mess, I am simply asking what does time mean for you? And more importantly, being aware of your mortality, are you using your time wisely? It is almost too heavy of a question to ask, and one that cannot be answered easily.

Tomorrow I will have been here for three months, and this is a question I have been asking myself as of late. In reality, I have had many enjoyable experiences within those three months: I spent a great weekend in Paris with loved ones (and as I remember, I am struck by the immense beauty that comes from spending time with those you love. Our strolls through chaotic streets, through slumbering neighborhoods, through herds of people, along a quietly flowing Seine, the glasses of wine, the laughter, the music floating all around, the jolts of the Metro, the smiles. Yes, Paris is alive! She breathes, she feels, she smiles, she cries. With one seductive kiss, she fills your lungs with her taste, and instantly, you are forever altered.  All of this beauty, and I have shared it with you two. Thank you.), I partied the night away in Ljubljana with new friends, I have seen a notable improvement in my conversational skills, I have ran along a glistening Adriatic while the sun set in a glorious blaze, as if it were her last, I have walked home at night (from parties, dinners, gatherings), I have danced, laughed, smiled, I have felt the caressing touch of rain, I have felt the cold chill of the Bora, and I have felt the warmth of a smiling sun. It's funny, looking at this list (and although I have let many things out), it seems like I have enjoyed many great experiences. Why doesn't it feel like it is enough? Am I expecting too much? From whom? I don't know the answer yet, but I am sure I will find it...hopefully. I know that I am incredibly fortunate to be in the position that I find myself in. This is, for all intents and purposes, an opportunity of a lifetime. I hope I am making the most of my time here.

In Constant Search

There are moments when I succumb to a quiet desperation; a desperation fueled by a yearning to find answers to problems I have not wholly identified. I seek answers. I seek truth. I seek understanding. This anxiety has been culminating for the past few weeks (and with greater emphasis, since I see this foreign environment as a means to finding some answers) and today, I feel like I have reached a satisfying, albeit anticlimactic, epiphany.

Here it is: RELAX!!!

This constant search of mine has created an ever growing wall of pressure that often becomes self-destructive. It has bred a feeling of dissatisfaction with who I am. Change, change, change is a constant beat in my head. Today, the beat has stopped. I am relieving much of the pressure. Although I still desire change and know that I need it, I am reminding myself to have patience. At a proudly naive 20 years of age, I cannot have such expectations.

I was under the false impression that things become easier as you grow older. I linked experience and wisdom with a better understanding of life and thus, a smoother journey to our inevitable march towards death. Now I see that all these different ideas one has on Life, including mine, are relative; the relativity of Life and, in effect, the relativity of truth.

Today, I feel a bit more whole. I have reminded myself of many important things and have reached another level of understanding. I am transforming my constant search into a constant journey. A journey towards the mountaintop, towards the eternally radiant heavens...


Now, to change the subject...

There is not much to report. I decided to change one of my classes and I am now taking Film History instead of Modern History. I just started lessons this week and I already love the class. The weather in Trieste grows colder by the day and I am realizing I am not prepared. I need to go shopping for some more winter gear or pack up some winter weight. The former sounds more appealing...although, I do LOVE to eat. Decisions, decisions. I have also met some more people and we're getting along great. That's pretty much all the news I have to report on Trieste. Life is pleasant at the moment.

Last weekend, Trevor came to visit me and we had a great time. We spent the first day meandering through Venezia's beautiful streets and visiting its beautiful sights. The rest of the weekend was spent in Trieste. We did not do a lot of sightseeing, but we did have a very relaxing weekend. It was great having him here and I hope he enjoyed himself. I know he was definitely happy to get out of Paris for a few days. For greater detail on his visit, you should check out his blog. He's great with details :-D

Ciao Tutti!

Long Overdue...

A lot of time has passed since my last update, so I am not sure where to begin. I guess a chronological approach would work best.

As I mentioned in my earlier post, I had hoped to take a weekend trip before my classes began. I did. I departed for Switzerland on the 18th before the sun had risen. Each time I board a train, I feel an exhilaration like no other, and this time was no different. The excitement of the journey was not enough to keep me awake, so I slowly drifted into a light slumber, partly induced by the gentle rocking of the train. The train ride had began as one would expect, but the smooth flow would not last. Approximately 3 hours into the journey, the train broke down in the middle of nowhere. As I see smoke running besides us, an announcement declares that the train has broken down. Two hours pass before another train arrives to haul us to the nearest station. We then board another train heading to Milano. Needless to say, it was not the greatest start to my excursion, but it wasn't the end of the world. And, on a brighter note, Trenitalia did provide us with free cookies, water, and candy bars.  Once in Milano, I boarded my train heading to Bern (a very nice train, at that) and relaxed while taking in the sights. As we traveled closer and closer to Switzerland, I noticed the landscape going through a dramatic transformation. The beauty increased tenfold and I was overcome by the sheer beauty of the landscape. Towering, emerald mountains against the deep silver of the sky created a scene that I hope forever remains in my heart. I made it to my destination after 13 hours of traveling.

I will not go into great detail on account of my laziness, but I had an amazing time and created memories that will last. My days passed quickly and I was able to see a lot of Switzerland: Zurich, Bern, Lucerne, and Steinen. I also had a great time with my friend. He was a gracious host and showed me a great time around that beautiful country of his. I did not want to leave, but Trieste was waiting for me. Looking back now, it all seems like a dream: the green hills, the strolls around cities, the late night drives, the endless lakes, the cows and their bells playing a chaotic, yet soothing melody, and the stars up above. Yes, Swtizerland, you have captured my heart and I cannot wait for our next encounter.

Upon my return, I felt a strange sensation. Although I did not want to leave, I was also happy to be back. I felt home, once again. Trieste had been waiting for me and I was glad to be back. The next two weeks were relatively uneventful. I have continued running regularly and am always pleasantly surprised that Trieste's beauty continues to inspire me. My affection grows stronger instead of diminishing. And I am happy for that.

I have began meeting more people in my dorm and have been going out with them. Most of them are from Spain and are very friendly and fun-loving people. My friend Irina has also arrived, since classes have started. She's also very friendly and fun to be with. I'm glad I have finally met people that I can hang out with and get to know. As for my courses, I will be taking 4 this semester, but only 2 begin in October. I just completed my first week of lectures, and I have to admit that I feel very overwhelmed. My grasp of Italian isn't up to par and thus, I am having great difficulty understanding the lectures. But, it is to be expected. These are regular courses at an Italian university, so there are terms and words that I don't understand. In time, I know it will get easier. So now, I am trying to prepare myself as best as possible. Our school systems are very different, so I have to make a much larger effort, which is something I am not accustomed to. But one must keep positive, and I know this experience is one that I must go through. The rewards will be great.

Until next time. 

"through the age of silent sunrise..."

As I breathed in such powerful words, inhaled its beauty in hope that it would caress the soul, the towering trees creating a protective shade that filters all but a few rays, I felt such pleasurable isolation. Oh what splendid joy. Oh what...a mosquito! I gave him a glare that signified disgust and quickly swatted it away. I attempted to submerge myself in the realm of Ms. Woolf once more, but I knew it was of no use. The mosquito would return. Normally, I would not have let an insignificant blood sucker ruin such joy, but these incessant pests have taken a liking to my blood. As it stands now, I have about eight, itchy bite marks all over my body. An increase in that number is not an option (although I know it is likely to increase), so I departed from that haven and made my way down to the more frequented path. Thus, my excursion to Il Castello Miramare ended and I made my way towards La Barcola, a promenade along the Adriatic.

The Castello Miramare is a very beautiful sight. It is situated on a cliff overlooking the Adriatic. There is also a huge park that makes up the area. Definitely a sight to explore. Once you leave the park grounds, La Barcola begins. Since Trieste lacks any real beaches, people lay their towel on this promenade and sunbathe there. It was interesting to see everyone taking in the sun and enjoying the beautiful weather. It was also nice to see the freedom people exercised while sunbathing, something I'm not accustomed to in the USA. I brought my running attire and decided to jog from the beginning of La Barcola back into the city. Oh what exhilaration one feels while running and taking in the beautiful and free-spirited atmosphere. I eventually reached my destination, Trieste's central train station. Drenched in sweat, I boarded the number 17 bus and made my way back to the university.

Besides this wonderful excursion, I haven't partaken in anything of real interest. I spent four days and traveled to 5 different offices in order to apply for my permit of stay. Unfortunately, my application was two days past the due date (Italy only gives you 8 working days to complete it). I hope it won't be a problem, since much of the delay was out of my control. I have also chosen my courses for the year and I'm very excited. I'll be taking some philosophy courses, some political science courses, and some history courses...all in Italian. This week I hope to start meeting more people. I am attending a meeting with an organization directly involved with ERASMUS (the study abroad organization of the EU) and I plan to join an Italian-American group in October. Classes begin the first week of October, so I really want to do something exciting before they begin. Hopefully I can take a weekend trip somewhere.

Oh, and I killed my first mosquito last night. Hopefully that will serve as a warning to the other mosquitoes that I am no longer playing nice.

Here are some pics: Click here!!!